Silence
by xox-Punk-Princess-xox
Summary: There was only so much he could take at once.    He was losing face, he was doubting himself.    Why was no one there to help him?    Possible spoilers for Chapter 25!


It was silent.

There wasn't a sound to be heard, he could barely hear his own breathing as he tried to muffle it- more like smother himself- with his arm over his mouth. The boy had been alone for a while now, left with nothing but the surrounding darkness, his sword, and the small sounds letting him know he was still alive and functioning.

Without them- he wouldn't be able to tell.

He felt numb.

The usual fire that ran through his veins had gone cold, ice cold as it was replaced by creeping vines of dread, and fear that snaked their way up his body, tearing through his rib cage to get to his heart. Slithering and snagging, like roses thorns they punctured the muscle, coiling tighter and tighter as the flesh ripped and tore, coiling into this massive knot as it viciously massacred his body from the inside out, leaving nothing but a small, desecrated ball of doubt and self hatred.

Shifting the weight of the sword slightly, he didn't even flinch when it slipped out of his grasp and clattered to the floor.

Still sheathed.

Suddenly filled with a burst of rage forced his weary body to stand, kicking the sword as hard as he could manage, hearing the satisfying crack of concrete as it collided with the wall. He was left standing there, body trembling, breath coming heavy as he could feel anger filling him, like a fire crackling beneath him, flames licking at his body as they melted away his flesh with their powerful heat. He was losing himself. Again- he couldn't control himself.

He realized that, of course. There was no point in trying-

Wild beasts couldn't be domesticated. That was all he was, a wild, savage beast that did nothing but cause havoc, mayhem, and destruction with whatever crossed his path. He couldn't save anyone- he couldn't be a hero. He could barely take care of himself, let alone others. What made him think that an animal could have the right to love anyone?

He should be used to this, after all- being alone.

Never being able to hold anything close to him.

It was fine; he would only break it, after all, if anyone came to close to him. Like he did with everything else.

That was all he could do.

He could only destroy things.

He was a demon, after all.

But- it wasn't fair. It just wasn't fair...

He had never asked for this.

He knew he was never quite normal. He knew he was always a reckless kid, always a problem. A bit too strong for his own good. But for all he knew, he had at least been a normal species- he had been _human_. Why did the world suddenly decide to take that away from him?

To take away his father...

Too many things were happening way too fast- and he was spiralling down, faster and faster, and he was trying to reach his hand out for someone to help him but _there was no one-_

No, of course there was no one. No one would help him- no one wanted to associate themselves with a monster.

He slumped back against the wall, bringing his knees to his chest as he put his head between them, hands clasping over his ears and eyes squeezing shut as he tried to block out the voices, the faces- things he knew weren't really there- but they were taunting him, _mocking_ him.

Fear.

Hate.

Distrust.

Disgust.

Disappointment- he could see it all in their eyes.

Move.

He knew he had to move- had to draw his sword- had to do _something._

But he couldn't.

There were no chains around him, nothing bounding him, but he felt this pressure, this presence keeping him rooted in place as it smothered him, suffocated him- his breath was coming faster now, and he couldn't even bring himself to contain his tears anymore.

He curled in on himself tighter, voice trembling as he asked to the empty cell.

"Why can't someone help me...?"

Rin was left there, with nothing but silence as his answer.

No one was going to help him.

He was alone.

It was nothing new to him, though.

Nothing had changed since then.

Not one thing.

The silence remained.


End file.
